Forget Willpower–It’s About Desire

It’s 6:30 a.m. 

J-man says: “Willpower.”

Me: “What about willpower?” (thinking ‘damn straight I’ve got some willpower to get up this early to write!’)

J-man: “Write about willpower.”


Me: ” I don’t believe in willpower. It’s about desire. You gotta desire something.”

You only get so much willpower. It ain’t a never ending well that you can draw on. Willpower gets used up on not screaming at your kids (or not screaming so much). Willpower gets used up on getting up early when you’re tired, so you can get that project done. Willpower gets used on saying “no” to the cookies. Willpower gets used on making yourself lace up the running shoes when you hate running. Willpower gets used on going to that job that you hate day after day.

You only get so much willpower. When it’s gone, it’s gone.

Changing your life. Doing something so huge and scary you don’t know how you’re gonna pull it off. Being magnificent. Living life as a Ten. Daring to live as the Badass Beauty you are, even though yo momma, yo papa, and everyone significant in your life told you to shush it up, hide your light under a bushel. Going for something because you know it’s right for you, even though it’s so counter-culture you have no examples to follow, and people will think you’re bat shit crazy. Those things don’t come from willpower. They can’t. They come from DESIRE.

Burning, gotta have it, gotta change it, can’t-stand-the-way-it-is, walk-over-hot-coals-and- broken-glass-to-get-it DESIRE.


Desire will get you up at 5 a.m. day after day. 

Desire will keep you training and lifting hard when you want to give up.

willpower and desire Kristi Joy Wilkins

Desire makes you say, “Shut the fuck up!” to the negative mind chatter.

Desire will open your heart again and again and again after you’ve been hurt.

Desire will cause you to try again and again and again when you fail.

Desire will keep you from listening to anyone who tells you that you can’t do it.

Desire  will keep you from eating all the cookies. 

Desire will drive you to find ways to make your Lover(s) sing, and your Babies have everything they need. 

Desire will cause you to show up as All That You Are in your full radiance–unashamed.

DESIRE. When not getting it is not an option.


You got it?

If you’ve got desire–to feel strong, confident, and sensual in your skin–but you don’t know where to start, what to do, or how to do it–I’ve got a plan for you.


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